Every child must be taught the fundamentals of living. This job rests primarily on the parents and within the home. (Proverbs 13:24; 22:15; 29:17; 20:11; 29:15; Ephesians 6:4; Colossians 3:21)
Children will, at some time in their lives, learn the lesson of submitting to authority. The question is, when and where will it happen. Will it be in some place other than in the home? Will it be at some time other than early in their lives? Where does God want this lesson to be learned? He wants it taught early in life and in the home.
Some say, "I don't spank my child because I love my child too much to do that." The fact is, one of the major causes of delinquency in our youth is that parents have been too passive in regards to the training and discipline of thier children.
There are two types of discipline:
1) Preventive - teaching what is right and wrong by word and action. Parents must instruct and they must lead by example. They must also mean what they say and teach. Words and instruction many times are not enough, and words are no good if they are not backed up with action.
2) Corrective - some form of punishment for wrong-doing, whether spanking or by removing some privilege from the child. Corrective punishment should never be done in anger or out of retaliation. It should also be done in love. Corrective discipline is designed to lead a child to obedience. If this result is not achieved, then it is likely that the discipline is not being administered correctly.
Guidelines for parents
Never show partiality.
Children have different natures, and if resentment develops because a child senses partiality, then discipline itself can lose all meaning.Both parents should be united in discipline.
Indecision between parents can ruin the good results of discipline. A child should never see his/her parents arguing over how to discipline.Both parents need to administer the discipline.
The father should take the lead and the mother should take and active role, never holding off the disciplining for the father alone.Be true to your word.
If you tell the child you will punish if need be and then do not, the child will lose respect for your word.Discipline at the right time.
If others are present, seek privacy with your child. Punishing in public will embarass the child. The child likely will focus on the fact that he/she is being watched than on the reason for the punishment.Discipline in the right way.
Never slap a child in the face. This is nothing more than humiliating. None of us want to slapped in the face. Don't "pitty-pat" a child when punishing - make your punishment firm. If the punishment does not get the childs attention immediately, the child will continue to "test" the parent to see what will be necessary for real punishment. A parent should never discipline only after the child drives them to it.Show love in discipline.
Let the child know that love is a part of the discipline. The child wants and needs the reassurance that they are loved. During moments of discipline, this is especially vital.
Proverbs 13:24 He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes.
Proverbs 22:15 Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.
Proverbs 29:17 Correct thy son, and he shall give thee rest; yea, he shall give delight unto thy soul.
Proverbs 20:11 Even a child is known by his doings, whether his work be pure, and whether it be right.
Proverbs 29:15 The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.
Ephesians 6:4 And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.
Colossians 3:21 Fathers, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged.
